No More Johnny Depp and Tim Burton Collabs Please

Rants & Raves is an opportunity for writers to express opinions, wax poetic and share thoughts about entertainment, politics, life, or whatever else they feel like talking about. These are strictly writer opinions and do not necessarily reflect the viewpoints of INFLUX Magazine, but rather provide an outlet to express one’s ideas.

by Martin Hafer

At one stretch of time, director Tim Burton made five straight films starring Johnny Depp. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Corpse Bride, Sweeney Todd, Alice in Wonderland and Dark Shadows.  Additionally, the duo made several other films together. The best of these, by far, was Ed Wood, which was a fine and very enjoyable biopic about a director who was reputedly the worst in film history. 

But the rest of these films are a strange confection of one ultra-weird production after another. The majority of the other films are about people who resemble no one you could ever possibly meet on this planet! 
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On their own, the films previously mentioned and the likes of Edward Scissorhands (another of their collaborations) are worth seeing.** But when watched one after the other, they all blend together and make you want to scream “ENOUGH!!”  Enough of the ultra-bizarreness and enough of films that lack depth.

So why am I writing this article now?  Well, recently it was announced that Burton and his long-time love, Helena Bonham Carter, are splitting up. So here is my suggestion. When it comes to dividing up the assets, please, please, please, let Ms. Carter have custody of Johnny Depp! Then we won’t need to be forced to see yet another forgettable and weird Depp-Burton performance.

**There is one notable exception: Sleepy Hollow is laden with great special effects, but it’s a terrible, joyless and odious sort of film that couldn’t be shown to prisoners of war due to them being protected under the Geneva Convention!