A film that makes Attack of the Killer Tomatoes look like an Oscar contender!

by Martin Hafer

This review is another of my “You Ain’t Seen Nothin’ Yet” articles, where I bravely watch specially selected, barely watchable films, so that I can report back to you folks. Beaster Day: Here Comes Peter Cottonhell is a film that reportedly cost about $150,000 to make. Amazingly, as I watched, I couldn’t understand how it even cost a tenth of that! After all, there is nothing professional at all about this mess of a film and it’s terrible in just about every way. And, perhaps this is being charitable! But, oddly, it’s strangely watchable in its awfulness and fortunately it never takes itself seriously. Because of this it reminds me of a much lower budgeted and even cheesier version of Attack of the Killer Tomatoes…with lots of gratuitous nudity, blood and foul language.

Beaster Day: Here Comes Peter Cottonhell
Directed by
Snygg Brothers
Cast
Jon Arthur, Kristina Beaudouin, Valerie Bittner
Release Date
2014
Martin’s Grade: F

The film has little in the way of plot or acting. Much of the film simply consists of total idiots or women who inexplicably take their clothes off that are eaten by a 50 foot rat-like creature. While this sounds pretty dumb, it’s much worse. The ‘killer bunny’ is obviously a marionette and the filmmakers really don’t try very hard to make it look realistic.

It rips people in half again and again throughout the movie–and repeatedly the incompetent stoner mayor keeps insisting that the killings are all being perpetrated by some Amish who have gone bad! So it’s up to the one semi-competent member of the local animal control unit to put a stop to this madness.
*****
Do I recommend the film? Well, maybe. If you have a high tolerance for the offensive and like a good laugh, then by all means give the movie a chance. It is pretty funny in a brainless sort of way. Better yet, see it with a group of like-minded friends so you can all sit around and laugh at this mess of a film. If, however, you the sort who impatiently waits for the next season of Downton Abbey or want to show a film to your Sunday school class, then perhaps you might just want to skip this incredibly silly and amateurish film. One way or another, don’t say I didn’t warn you!